What i used to

I was thinking about how what used to be true about us probably says a lot about who we are now.

You see, I recently signed up on Facebook. I told Lisa that I can't make sense of anything that is posted on my wall because I feel like I'm coming into the middle of every conversation. She said that I felt that way because I'm an old guy.

One of my "friends" asked about why I put my full name "Patrick" on my profile. She remembers how when we used to work together that my work email had been patrick.hachee. But everyone knew me as just "pat." So there would be a ton of emails to pat.hachee, mostly requests for me to do more work, that I would never get. This was annoying twice, but GGGreat about a thousand times. So she just figured this same sort of thing happened again I suppose.

So that got me to thinking that having a Facebook profile was going to bring together maybe too many of my worlds. People who used to know me with people who now know me without all the things I choose to leave out about myself for whatever reason.

Like for instance, I now introduce myself as "Patrick" to new people I meet. I decided to do that when we moved back from San Francisco. Why? Some reasons practical, some reasons psychological.
--Most of my life when I have introduced myself as "Pat" people would respond "Hi, Matt." Apparently there aren't as many "Matrick's" around.
--Also, it makes me feel more like a grown up and less like a kid.
--The formality of it gives me a kind of social security-blanket (although this post just ruined that).
--I've never really gotten over the SNL skit "It's Pat," about an androgynous person that aired when I was in junior high.
--I met a group of students from Ireland once and to a person when I introduced myself they would say, "Patrick, now that's quite Irish." For some reason I liked feeling part of their group, probably because I'm actually a very American mix of quite a lot of ancestry, but it felt good to be part of the group.
-- And MOSTLY (and because this post is getting too long), I just like it better.

I must add, that for those who have known me as "Pat," that I don't mind at all, it makes me feel the closeness that a nickname is supposed to suggest in the first place. I must ALSO add that for those who have recently gotten to know me as "Patrick" that I wasn't trying say we wouldn't be close, but rather I was hoping to let you know the best version of myself, which hopefully is the current one. Sometimes people will ask which do I prefer and I'll say either is fine, but really I'm lying, because I prefer Patrick.

Now, what other things used to be true about me? Don't worry, murderer is not one of them. I think this might be my newest question for dinner conversation.